Get Up Stand Up

I'm not sure if it's the juxtaposition of man's decent into a mutated sense of over-masculinity against the desire to understand the post-revolution woman, but I am faced with a very serious peeve.

Maybe I'm alone in this one, and I'm the one with the problem, but why are there so many piss sissies lately?

This phenomenon is limited to the men's bathroom, so allow me to clarify exactly what I mean (for those of you who have never been within). A gentleman's lavatory consists of: urinals, toilet stalls, sink(s) and paper towel dispenser, or the dreaded "blow dryer of death" that seems to assail you with enough force to peel skin, yet still leaves your hands moist.

For whatever reason, more and more men seem inclined to urinate standing up in a bathroom stall instead of using the urinal, for which it stands. Let me say that I completely understand that if the urinals are all occupado, then certainly the stall is your only option, and by all means, let loose like Victoria Falls, or the proverbial racehorse.

I'm not sure if these men are just ashamed of their penis size, or completely homo-phobic, but I'd probably guess the former over the latter as the root cause. I realize that there is a certain amount of pseudo-disrobing that is necessary, but unless you're an exhibitionist or you are actually saddled with a genuine voyeur, there's nothing exposed to any easily-visible sightlines. Maybe there's an entire generation of men that are coming from parents that allow school and television to teach, and something is simply missing in their education.

I suppose it could be worse - if the gents were heading into the stalls and sitting down to pee, that would be an even bigger problem.

Although this may seem like an odd grievance, I had to get it off my chest. I don't think it's too much to ask. We're not in Germany, and we aren't haunted by femi-nazi "toilet ghosts", so there's really no reason for all of this.

All I'm asking is that you stand up and take matters into your own hands. Man up, and use the urinals before they become extinct. If you allow that to happen, then maybe you're in the wrong restroom to begin with...