Light of Love

there once was a shadow who longed
to be more, to reclaim wonder of long ago
the dark was thrilling and freeing
but there was much to slip between the fingers
resigned to the sentence of night
bound to the blackness of saying no
drunk on the most bitter tinctures
till only the aftertaste of regret lingers
abused, denied, betrayed and wronged
but the greatest wounds all self-inflicted
hope was the punchline to the funniest joke
that he would never learn to laugh

the shadow could smile, could mimic and pretend
this spectre would become son, brother or friend
white-washed just enough to nearly best
the noir that separated him from the rest

swinging around, as by a derelict puppeteer
slung poorly on strings of condemned and convicted
while mangled gestures and crude emotions
tumbled out along his blind path
he knew of the light of day, but not wholly
more like the etiolated impressions of infancy
stolen memories of someone he might have been
or perhaps just wished he could be
here is the character, almost solely
bound to the stone that whistles downward
through the abyss only the maker has seen
in the center of what could be a great heart

half hidden and heavy-lidded, he proceeds
driven but aimless, traveling without moving
skirting the light while tethered to the gravity
of mothing a flame he can neither possess nor extinguish
in twilight he grapples with the weight
of his flicker that will leave no proving
no anti-sun ever cast shade on the beaming world
yet even a dying light helps an umbra distinguish

if passing is my purpose, the footfalls full
as I lose my dreams, yet feel their pull
of shimmering, shining purpose untamed
only to sing the unsung with a title unnamed

though I cling to the life that beats me down
I have moments of purity that thrill my soul
by grace, I am still granted so much good
as the veil never obscures, and I live the lesson true
if I let pity reign, my tears would drown
I would rather battle and miss a worthy goal
I always strive to be more than misunderstood
by faith, cause dark substance, in a sunbeam, to imbue
I have loved light, and in return, but never can possess it
I have been accepted, but never belong, and I can only bless it
bless the light, the love, and those who bask
in the glow of that elusive bright
of the eyes that see this dimness, I can only ask
that you cast me in a forgiving light